IF THE UNIVERSE HARBORS INTELLIGENT LIFE BESIDES OUR OWN WHY HAVE THEY NOT CONTACTED US?

IF THE UNIVERSE HARBORS INTELLIGENT LIFE BESIDES OUR OWN WHY HAVE THEY NOT CONTACTED US?

[from the forthcoming book, A Bohemian in a Precarious Belfry - Vol. I: Poetry & Prose, by David Scott]

First, a couple considerations.  Notice that I did not say “Why have they not visited us?”  They may well have… and deemed us unworthy of contact.  You know; conversation, sharing, caring, etc.

Next, “besides our own” is quite a conceit, I admit.  Earth’s “intelligent life” as represented by Man is only a standing in comparison to… oh, earthworms, perhaps.  I know people who consider cats, dogs, elephants, dolphins, and others to be more intelligent than Man.  (Mankind, humankind, peoplekind… whatever the fuck is your preferred disposition, okay?  *smile*).

Now.  We have to recognize that intelligent beings capable of interstellar travel (by decades, at least… our decades… and likely centuries [if you believe in the concept of time… itself actually an illusion]) are not interested in us.

They “Just aren’t that into you.”  And me. They’ve likely buzzed past the planet, scanning for something that might approach their intelligence, their interest, even just looking for something worthwhile to steal:  Technology; resources; interesting creatures with which/with whom to have sex – if they have sex - or just to perform some measure of colonization. 

Maybe they’ve hovered, invisible, looking right at you.  (You’re boring).

But, just like you rushing into your office, your tradespace, your favorite coffeeshop, you cannot be bothered much to stop and admire an anthill.  Even if you do, watching little creatures carrying eggs, wandering about, doing their little ant-things, you’re not gonna sit in the dirt.  “Hi, little ant!  What’s your name?  Is there anything that discretionizes you from the other hundred ants I see scurrying about?  None that I can see, but I don’t want to pre-judge you!  Well, I better get going.  I’ll be coming along this way tomorrow – hope to see you later!”

We all have to realize we’re just not that great.  We’re still scrapping and fighting and killing each other.  We have doomsday weapons.  Great.  That’s a real plan for attracting cool creatures cruising the galaxy. 

We’ve got stupid people, by way of just one example, who want to cut off their joysticks!  Be a woman if you want but, fer chrissakes, you can pee standing up, you dumb fuck!  That’s a big, convenient, advantage.  What’s wrong with “Chickx with dickx”?  I mean, I’m not into ‘em (literally not into ‘em!!  *shudder*), but cutting, splitting, splaying your dick??  To make a fake vagina?  Hell, docs can’t even get lips (um, face lips) right yet.  Damnnnnn…  !

No wonder there’s been no contact.

“Hey, drop in sometime!  We got this little ball, kinda modest, but we call it home and we like it.  Oh, by the way, if this planet’s rockin’, don’t come a’knockin’.  It might be from these things we got; nuclear weaponry… atomic bombs.  Heck, one of our despots might even release chemical rain, or drop an EMP condition on, well, whole countries… those are – oh, never mind.  Just suffice to say those areas will be chaos.  It’s unlikely we’ll be dusted and vacuumed – ha ha.

“Mushroom clouds?  Better come back next Tuesday – if anything’s left.  Meantime, have a nice day!  Er, whatever time zone or chopped, sliced, and diced elements of time you observe by planetary, star, whatever rotations and shiny things you have.

You guys must be cool.  Gals too, if you have ‘em.  Any other identities?...  We got some classic cars, muscle cars, planes, jets, boats, other collections and crafts we can show you. 

But you got interstellar craft!

P.S.  Can you save us?

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I am a U.S. Army veteran (HQ, 500th Military Intelligence Brigade [Japan]; 1st Personnel Command [1st PERSCOM, Europe]; Office of the Deputy Chief of Staff for Operations and Plans [ODCSOPS, Pentagon], more) and a retired Fortune500 I.T. executive (Young & Rubicam, Inc., DC-NY; Burson-Marsteller, LLC, DC-NY, more) as well as employment at major non-profits (Nat’l. Food Processors Assoc., N. VA [now GMA]; Water Environment Federation, N. VA, more); as well as Top Secret contract work for clients. I have passed four FBI background checks, the most recent in June of 2022. I am also the author of the novel THE GRIM GRIND OF LIFE:  A PI’s strange bounces through a surfeit of eateries, juke joints, and dark doorways.  Prior, I authored the MBA-text I.T. WARS: Managing the Business-Technology Weave in the New Millennium (UofW, UofMD, more than a dozen others). The latter book’s last chapter discusses energy and U.S. grid vulnerabilities, and remains a leading-voice in those realms. Books and expanded bio are available on Amazon.